Despite my (perhaps less than) obvious enlightenment and maturity, I just can’t help giggling like a pervert when I hear some perfectly innocuous words in the English language. I’m curious to discover if - being a bastion of good taste, decorum and ethical morality - NZMusic’s fellow patrons have a similar clandestine penchant for infantile titter.
I know this is obtuse, but here a some of the worst offenders:
Homeowner
Pianist
Uranus
Titter
Arsenic
I’m sure you get the idea.
Does anyone else suffer from the same affliction?
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I like using words that I know make ...
I like using words that I know make other people uncomfortable, like 'moist'.
I still can't get the hang of rappers ...
I still can't get the hang of rappers talking about their "flow".
I think it's great that they're ...
I think it's great that they're getting in touch with their inner-womanhood and goddess power.
Moist was how we used to describe hot ...
Moist was how we used to describe hot chicks when i was in high school.
"that Joanna, she's really moist" translated to "that Joanna, is a very beutiful young lady"
Not sure if it used as such in this day and age? I hope it is ha ha ha
Even funnier/offensiver (yeah I know ...
Even funnier/offensiver (yeah I know offensiver isn't a word, but what can you do) than the word "moist," is the word "moisty." Makes me laugh and cringe at the same time - which is a phenomenon that should be embraced by all.
Oh I'm moist every time i log on to ...
Oh I'm moist every time i log on to nzm.
I suffer from the like disease, ...
I suffer from the like disease, "humerous Nameviticus".
Examples include the UN Advisior on Tuberculocious, Dr. Dick Baumgardner
Christchurch Real Esate Agent, Dick Hamburger
ATP Auckland Tennis Organizier, Dick Palmer
Guitar Instructor, Dick Hymens.
Yes their is a recurring theme here, No I dont know what that means.
Does anyone here suffer from "Work Association"? As in where any everyday work occurence causes a uncontrollable musicial reaction ie:
Yesterday some pizzas fell of the forklift. Their flavour was "Tropicana". For the rest of the day I had "Club Tropicania" by Wham! in my head. It was nearly as intolerable as the old chimes on the Vogels line which were the exact intervals as Whitesnakes"Their I Go Again".Its hell for a jazzer, i tell ya.
//Yesterday some pizzas fell of the ...
//Yesterday some pizzas fell of the forklift.
Mahahahah. I'm laughing just picturing that. They must have been huuuuge fucking pizzas to need a forklift. Do you mean a real, actual-sized industrial forklift? What the hell were pizzas doing on a forklift?! Brilliant!
they might have been in boxes......
they might have been in boxes...
The Watties "Infomercial" hostess is ...
The Watties "Infomercial" hostess is called GAY DICK.
Surely we have a winner.
Or what about people who never should ...
Or what about people who never should have named there companies after themselves? I mean, if your name was say, Mr Hooker, wouldn't you come up with something like First National or The Professionals or something?
Then there were the gib-stoppers called Keig Brothers. Their slogan was
Keig Brothers
Get Plastered.
Bottom,...
Bottom,
Ha ha ha nice! My fav' has to be . ...
Ha ha ha nice!
My fav' has to be . . . . POO, it's the funnest word ever created. Ha ha ha makes me laugh just writing it! . . . . POO ha ha ha
POO
//POO yeah i know its not smart or ...
//POO
yeah i know its not smart or clever and there is no play on words and i should be old enough to not
laugh like a 4 year old at it, but damn its funny.
Personally, I think the funnest word ...
Personally, I think the funnest word ever invented was Splurk.
Ha ha even funnier is to put them all ...
Ha ha even funnier is to put them all together!
you can please yourselves with the order.
Trod. Hahaha. ESPECIALLY when ...
Trod.
Hahaha.
ESPECIALLY when combined with poo.
eg. Mega's Brother: "Seiko trod in poo!"
boozies touche my favourate 2 ...
boozies
touche
my favourate 2 words at the moment & in my opinion not used in everyday conversation enough.
If you're immature when it come to ...
If you're immature when it come to names (like I am!) move to France for a while - they have the best names. I've heard heaps of particularly dodgy ones, and as it's the custom for people to hyphenate their last names, you get some fantastc matches. The only one I can think of right now, thought, is 'Labite', which translates directly into 'the penis'.
Changing your name is a tough one in France, takes months, if they allow it at all - the poor Labites wouldn't be allowed to, but Robspierres and similar politically 'offending' names can be changed.
Crazy French people.
Apartently "zi zi" in French is slang ...
Apartently "zi zi" in French is slang for penis.
And there's a band called ZZ Top!
- Dick Smith electronics - boo-boo ...
- Dick Smith electronics
- boo-boo (Boob-oooo)
- Arsenal (soccer team, military capibility)
- But
- Pussy (as in cat)
Especially the old TV ad... "Dick ...
Especially the old TV ad...
"Dick Smith Electronics, where everything connects! Ohhhh!"
Used to crack 8yo me & friends up.
Arsenal had a Goalkeeper called David ...
Arsenal had a Goalkeeper called David Seamen.
Other hall of famers include West Ham/Lecister Paul Dickov
and Middlesborough/Bradford's Dean Windass.
What were these peoples schooldays like?
The Hurricanes have a Hooker named Hore....
The Hurricanes have a Hooker named Hore.
//Arsenal had a Goalkeeper called David ...
//Arsenal had a Goalkeeper called David Seamen
...and wasn't he aptly named. He looked just like a porn star, didn't he.
Someone I knew's last name was Hore. ...
Someone I knew's last name was Hore. She was related to all the Hores in Otago.
There are a lot of Hores in central ...
There are a lot of Hores in central otago, all through the maniatoto and over danseys pass. Most famous is probably John Hore (a famour (erk) NZ country singer) who changed his name to John Hore Grenell and then John Grenall (Grenall being his mother's maiden name). Apparently the American's couldn't deal with Hore, hence the name change.
No. I deny all knowledge of anything to do with Hores or cuntry music.
The word "twat" used as an insult makes ...
The word "twat" used as an insult makes me laugh every time.
and brother of twat is a well timed ...
and brother of twat is a well timed 'dick'.
True....
True.
not exactly an every day word, but ...
not exactly an every day word, but still makes me snicker
Annus Horribilus
Do you subscribe to Pop Bitch? Cos they ...
Do you subscribe to Pop Bitch? Cos they used that a lot this issue.
no. do they have a website?...
no.
do they have a website?
popbitch.com. Hightlights from ...
popbitch.com.
Hightlights from their last newsletter - Tatu's Annus Horribilis:
Scandal prone and over-the-hill pop stars are
once again relying on being Big In Japan to
salvage their careers. Courtney Love has signed
up for a comic book series and Tatu star in
a manga movie, Tatu Paragate.
2004 had been an eventful year for Tatu. Manager
Ivan Shapovalov was sacked after the girls
refused to work with him, saying he was "mentally
sick". This followed a reality TV show debacle,
documentary where Julia confessed to using heroin,
lawsuit in which the band's songwriters sued for
$2.5m unpaid royalties and the failure to start
recording the new album, which was due in March.
Then, of course, Julia got pregnant. A Russian
newspaper reported that Julia wanted an abortion
but was told by the clinic it was "now or never",
as another abortion would leave her infertile.
Julia reluctantly went ahead. "Obviously we will
not be celebrating a wedding", she, er, enthused.
So, by 2005 we should find out if Tatu will ever
make another record. And more importantly, what
bizarre celebrity baby name will Julia inflict
on her Tatulette?
I love popbitch.
do you read NW?...
do you read NW?
When other people buy it, or after a ...
When other people buy it, or after a Big Fashion Extravaganza (ie: the Oscars). But NW is sadly lacking in things like dog porn and masturbation, which pop bitch really isn't.
I used to love the word Nipples...I ...
I used to love the word Nipples...I used to think of song titles and tv programes and replace a word with Nipple/s.
for example:
Nipple Street
Suzies Nipple
I Dream of Nipple
Queer Eye for the straight Nipple
Smells like teen Nipple
Nipple in a bottle
I'm not a girl, not yet a nipple
......i could go on....but i really can't be bothered. hahaha you get the idea.
The word Moist tho, makes me squemish :s
you should try replace the word 'you' ...
you should try replace the word 'you' with 'poo' when singing along... it's hilarious. "iiiiii will always love poooooooooo," warbles whitney houston...it works with just about anything!
Hahaha, that's classic, i'll have to ...
Hahaha, that's classic, i'll have to try that one! :)
"New Zealand Music" is one that always ...
"New Zealand Music" is one that always gives me a tickle
that's 3 words...
that's 3 words
slapper, gay, phat...
slapper, gay, phat
I listen to concert fm. Every week at ...
I listen to concert fm.
Every week at least once without fail, I have to do a double take,
as I hear the announcer say loud and clear,
"and the penis on that recording was Piers Lane "
(or whoever.)
Why can't they just say "Pi-AH-nist" ?!?
Mooted....
Mooted.
i have to say ,the best word ever is ...
i have to say ,the best word ever is WAZZOCK!! not that ita word or anything........moist is good,it coulds mean so many different types of wet,all you need is moist!
Has anyone mentioned "rissole"?...
Has anyone mentioned "rissole"?
ha ha - rhymes with......
ha ha - rhymes with...
I love it when people say"peenalised" ...
I love it when people say"peenalised" instead of "penalised". Also just the word penal.
Another favourite is "come". You know those great times when someone says come in an ordinary sentence but somehow they exaggerate the "c" sound and you have a good laugh all round?! The same can be said for "slot".
......hahaha...slot.
Jobs...
Jobs