PlaySchool

Okay, here's my Play School story.

I was on the show in the mid 70s, resplendent in my brown cord overalls, blue polo skivvy and bay city rollers haircut. They had this 'show-and-tell' section on the show where you got to show off your prized possession, for which I had brought in my 'amazing tumbling car' -- it'd go a million miles an hour at whatever you aimed it at, then had a tumbling mechanism that let it climb up whatever obstacle was in the way, flip over, and come straight back to you. Theoretically. When my turn for toy glory came around, I aimed it at the nearest wall, let go, and watched with horror as it deviated from my planned path, and veered across the studio towards Camera #1. I chased after it, but it was too quick, richocheted off the cameraman's foot, took a left turn, and tore off towards the book area, where a quick-witted, but slightly dim stage manager managed to grab it and steer it back towards the cluster of children still waiting to show off their toys. There followed a few moments of mayhem as terrified pre-schoolers scattered in all directions, fleeing the rampaging car. "Time for our milk, I think," suggested the host for the day (a lovely lady, whose name I forget).

We all sat down at chairs behind this long desk, and had a big glass of milk plonked down in front of us. Hot from my car-chasing endeavours, and the burning studio lights (and that skivvy was doing me no favours), I gulped mine down in a flash. The host was babbling on about something, I forget what, but then I do recall, with vivid clarity, the words ... "ok children, you can drink your milk now."

I'd totally forgotten we needed permission to drink! I remember at the time thinking I was pretty sharp holding the glass back up to my mouth and pretending to drink the milk again, but, when I watched the show a few weeks later on telly, it was plainly obvious I was faking it (no gulping, the glass was held at a static 90 degree angle, and I was even moving my head around all over the show to see if anyone had sussed my faux pas). The shame.

But what really annoyed me was game time. I sooooo wanted to have a go with the box planes, but we played that stupid balancing a book on your head game instead. Jipped.