close encounters with street people
strange leftfield topic, yes it is - chance of someone replying 20/80 haha
encounters with street people can be dangerous, scary, insiteful, educational......well lots of things really. something i find though, they always are bloody interesting!
does anyone have any stories to tell about the street people of your town?
here is a recent encounter from my trip to wellington..........
i was approached in cuba street by this guy. His opening line was "hey would you be interested in buying... *my eyes lit up* (then he said) "a poem." (fuck!
) In Auckland ive been hit up to buy lots of things on the street, but never a poem. (haha) Anyway i shrugged him off just out of a defensive reaction i suppose.
10 minutes later i went into a cafe and there he was selling his poems to all the punters drinking coffee. He made his way over to our table and oblivious to the fact we had met 10 mins ago, went on to explain again how he was a poor struggling, hungry, student/artist/musician, and asked if we would like to buy a poem. The poem was a $2 "donation" and he offered a money back guarantee, if we didnt like it we didnt have to pay for it. I accepted this time hoping to be inspired or hear something really great.
Insted what i got was a rip-off blended love poem made up totally of Rage Against the Machine lyrics. I felt sorry for him and paid him anyway, then he went on to say how great our food looked (hint hint) I watched him work the cafe for a while, before her returned and tried to sell us yet another poem! He must of made about $20 in 30 mins, fuck he makes more than i do!
"what do you want to be when you grow up" "i wanna be a motherfucking hussler, you better ask somebody"
Comments
someone must know the wellington poem hussler
Yeah I was in Fidels last week and this guy came up, I paid for a poem and kinda enjoyed it. It was about the guys first sexual experience which happened in a church conffesional booth (yeah right?), anyway there was some lyric about Starwars boxer shorts which kinda tickled my fancy (whatever that means).................tickled my fancy?
i think the wellington busker/husslers have the edge over any other ive seen.
i saw a guy standing in front of a shop, empty guitar case open in front of him, holding a sign saying need money for instrument!
that man has the skills to pay the bills
theres a guy in auckland who thinks he's slim shady and was abducted by aliens. he will dance naked in a field as long as you give him vodka and promise that ACC will cover it.
he's cool.
hey where does he hang out?
how bout that annoying blues guy, who always has his faithful bogan audience.
its real funny he thinks he is some kind of ledgend, but he fully sucks.
buskers with amps is not on!
// hey where does he hang out?
i donno. we found him outside real groovy and he followed us around and ended up drinking with us. he disappeared, but at 3am we found him at burger king, where he took great pride in telling us how he fucks his mother.
havent seen the annoying blues guy.... where does he hang around?
people who busk in gore are SO funny.
//people who busk in gore are SO funny.
Yeah but that only happens once a year, but I do agree that it is funny
Gore is just a red neck/bogan anyway
BAD BOY BUBBY!
they blues guy has been on one of those nz cops shows or something. he normally hangs outside BK but ive seen him in a few different spots. your not missing much so dont bother. he has an amp and plays really loud, i think its to scare away the competition.
one of my faves is the young girl who reads margaret mahy stories, once i listened for half an hour. some say she is mean, but she is only about 12 so go figure
There's this guy in New Plymouth who I would describe as a busker cum cowboy cum preacher cum pig hunter . He has been working the streets (excuse the phrase) since I was knee high to a grass hopper. Strumming his faithful gat, singing a song that doesn't seem to make sense or have an ending and promptly showing his appreciation for your coinage with an elvis style "Thangu-very-much-god-bless-you"
those are the best kind!
Kenny?! banished from courtenay place by a multiplex and relocated to new plymouth? could it be??
Rest assured Kenny is still cranking dirty ol courtney place, saw him in the weekend
Theres always the crazy religious people with phamplets. And if you don't get away fast, they won't let you go. Some guy was ranting about going to heaven to my friends, they tried several times to excuse themselves but he'd be like "one more thing..."
I can't stand talking to religious people on streets. I can cope (just) with religion when it's not being forced upon me, or preached to me. Ugh.
Heh heh heh. Don't get me started on that......
There's a guy at Christmas that dances around the streets playing an accordian in an elf suit. At first I thought that someone employed him....but sadly, no.
heheh, i always have full-on fights with the freaky religious people.
I would, but I'm too scared. I always think of funny things I could do afterwards. ie, with this guy.... "we're going to Lauraland when we die. It's on a faaaar-away planet. The only way to get there is by flying saucer!" That was a more innocent idea.... *giggle*
lol! hey, when they offer you their books, say "thanks! they make really great coasters". that really annoys them.
Ohh, and in Christchurch we have a regular accordion player. Once I saw someone join her, another random person with a violin. It was really sweet, seeing the 2 strangers playing their instruments together. (tho I can't say I enjoyed it to much ;-) )
I always liked the accordion player because her playing normally signalled it was time to go home from work. The dude with the bag pipes was really annoying though. Does ChCh still have that rabid Christian who shouts so loud you can't understand what he's saying? Last I heard he was banned from the Square.
Haha, hope so. I'm not sure, I don't spend much time in the square.
//At first I thought that someone employed him....but sadly, no.
Lmao. heheheheh, it is sad. yet funny. & scary.
imagine if we organised a "battle of the buskers" competition judging could be on atire, footpath presence, and most money in the hat in 3 minutes
it happens in Nelson as part of our summer festival, it runs for a week with international buskers coming, and there is a busk off on the Friday evening and the winner is chosen by amount of money earned, I think it is part of a buskers tour.... they come for the arts festival in welly, they have a buskers thing as part of that too
no shit! geez i was only joking, but hell......
a buskoff? thats the funniest shit ive ever heard of!
im so out of touch with the whole scene these days
how do they get around?
do they have secret parties?
i was in vancouver a couple of weeks ago, and seriously - their street people, or 'bums' as they are so fondly known as over there, kick our nz bums way over the fence...in the space of just 10 mins i was asked for (all by different people): -sex, - dope, - money, - my shoes, - and whether i wanted to buy a menu some guy had picked up off the street for $2 canadian dollars.
its absoloutly crazy.
I hear ya, vancouver's got some mean streets. east hastings saw a guy, looks like a jock, on crutches. he's walking along, he gets hassled by a 'bum' for money. the crippled jock refuses, bum grabs one of guy's crutches and proceeds to beat jock over the head with it. middle of the afternoon, cop car 2 blocks down outside (and I shit you not) a doughnut shop.
I was in a George Street Burger King in Sydney, and if anyone knows George Street, you'll know what I'm talking about, there was this smelly crusty homeless-lookin guy in the queue right in front of me quietly ranting to himself. When it came his turn to order he started screaming at the top of his lungs while doing a tap dance, he then slipped over and had to be escorted out.
I laughed, but was scared on the inside.
the thing that got me over in canada were the hookers.
i was walking along a nice suburban street at 7:30pm (in full daylight....) and standing on the corner was two hookers, both wearing bright fluro bike-shorts, white stockings, plastic high-heels, loose t-shirts, and leather jackets that were way to big for them. they had blue eyeshadow up to their eyebrows and the brightest lipstick you've ever seen, and their hair was sooooo 80's its just not funny.
the worst thing was, they followed me and my friend into wal-mart (the warehouse of canada) and harrassed us coz we didnt have drugs for them. once they had finished with us, they went outside and hopped into some sleazy guy's car, who drove off.
we never saw them again *thank-god*....
Dunedin people - how's Speedy these days?
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winter's generally bad for Speedy - last time I saw him, he was outside Hoyts, throwing up pure white wine ... not a pleasant way to be. But he seems less agitated these days, less frenetic.
There are heaps of eccentrics in Dunners ... i think the longer you stay, the more likely you are to become one yourself. i feel it happening to me ... once you get past the age of the uni crowd, you start to stand out, until you go have a family or get domestic etc etc ...
weird age gap - everyone goes to Welly or London, and comes back when they're 30 something ...
Christchurch had Radio Joe (aka The Radio Guy etc) but I haven't seen him for ages tho. Everyone knew him, everyone has had encounters with him sometime. Tis funny how cities have people like that, who are celebrities pretty much. (He was known for his radio which was always on his shoulder)
what about the wizard? hes pretty whacko
he is buried under that ugly sculpture
//Christchurch had Radio Joe (aka The Radio Guy etc)//
I thought his name was radio Ron !!
I saw him in town about a week ago, without his radio !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DEAD?
well that's a bad start to my day......
The Wizard's actually a smart cookie. He's got a Ph.D in the Sociology of Art, and used to teach some courses in the Philosophy of Art at Canterbury Uni.
But dead? Really? Didn't hear about that one...
[ http://www.wizard.gen.nz/ ]
Bullshit. I saw & talked to him last night, so unless he dropped dead in the last 12 hrs (& I would have been told if that were true) hes all good.
sorry wizard fans
that was a totally fabricated lie, its just he wasnt there when i wen t to ch ch. all i saw was an ugly sculpture (dig dig)
Any Big Issue street sellers in NZ?
Here in Glasgow, these guys stand on EVERY corner and outside the train/underground exits and flog off these shitty publications. If you dont buy one they are bloody agressive and ask for money for food,booze or the honest ones will ask for a couple of quid for heroin or crack.
The best buskers are on Venice Beach, California, some brilliant acts!!
the easiest way to get rid of anyone whos trying to sign you up for an organisation (like those guilt-tripping greenpeace bastards), is tell them that youre already a member.
i told the world vision people that i sponsored 8 children already. hehe
(btw, i have nothing against greenpeace and world vision, but some of those people who try to sign you up on the street are downright MEAN!)
ooooh girl, you're going straight to hell! ....and i'll be going there too i guess cos that's my standard too.
//giult-tripping greenpeace bastards// that is mean of mean. But I dont blame you. I support greenpeace monthly, & sponsor a child myself & through work. But a couple of them are a little fanatical to say the least!
Hmmmm there are some wierd buskers here in Melb too. There happens to be a simular guy who sells cliched poetry, but for $20 rather than $2.
There is this guy who walks arround who is really cool, i dont think he is a busker or anything, but whenever i see him he is always giving dirrections. MY friend and i call him 'Skinny santa' like the guy from The Simpsons because he wears a Santa jacket and belt but is really young, tall and thin. I guess the other wierd thing is that he wears it all the time.
This one busker-jugler guy once was going absolutely insane, i was a bit worried so i walked right arround him becuase i didnt want to bother him. However he still spotted me and chased me down the street with these two sticks held to his head making noises like a bull or something. Next time i saw him he threw his juggling balls at me and my friend screaming "Have some balls, Ladies!"
Another old guy i once saw in the Burke st mall pulled a bag of rice out from under his trench coat, opened it, sat down on a bench and then poured it all over himself. The next thing i knew all the pigeons that had been arround came swooping over and he was covered in this birds. This worried me firstly because i heard that rice kills birds (is this true?). Another thing is that most of them were probably desease ridden. He was laughing and seemed harmless, but i have heard since that he was a regular but is not really allowed to be in the city any more or something.
Oh and the wierdest street person i know is this wierd woman who runs down the streets arround one of the main roads with a radio in her hand. She rolls along the ground and ducks behiend hedges like a secret agent. Then when she gets to her house she pretends to open all these doors that arnt even there. She lives right near my sisters old uni in sunshine so i used to see her heaps.
BTW: the easiest way to get rid of jehovas witness types is to tell them that you're Jewish. We used to get those sorts of groups at our door every few days, and then we told one lot of them that we were actually Jewish and none of them ever came back again.
A Jewish friend of mine told me about this because apparently they dont bother her either; they have some theory that it is impossible to convert a Jew.
Anyone who lives in Essendon will also know the man with no jaw. ....hmmmm.
//A Jewish friend of mine told me about this because apparently they dont bother her either; they have some theory that it is impossible to convert a Jew.
That is true in a sense - if you're born Jewish (or convert to Judaism), you'll always remain Jewish even if you refuse to recognise yourself as a Jew or convert to something else.
Speaking of Melbourne, jeez I've bumped into some weirdos there:
- in the CBD - a guy with his beard in dreadlocks.
- CBD - one of those portable stall-vendors with a long droopy moustache spotted me in a rugby jersey, put his hand on my shoulder and asked "who's ya playin'?".
- CBD - a smiley chick in hippie-style clothes tried to sell me a book written by "a monk".
- Body Shop, Chadstone - one of the female shop attendants, while sweeping the floor, broke into a very happy sort of dance.
I lurve Australia!
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Thats right i thought that knew that Jewish thing was right!
Yeah Melb does have heaps of oddball folks. A barrel of laughs i say!
There was once this guy on the city loop train who was about 40 odd and was dressed like on of the villiage people or something. He was really 'tough' and kept telling everyone to shut up and all, wearing huge combat boots and builders clothing......but also a sparklysilver pair of Kylie Mynogue style hot pants! LOL
This one woman on the lilydale train was running up and down hitting the wall of the train saying into a mobile phone "this is so Embaressing!" .....go figure
Hate to say this, but I work for a charity here in Scotland, and get fucking good money for doing so....
35% goes to the cause, the rest to us...
Such shame, but apparently Greenpeace is worse!!!!
as long as you dont chase people down the street yelling "you don't care about the environment, do you!! you're just selfish, working your well-paying job and keeping all the money for YOURSELF. so selfish!! what about the animals!!!!"
of course, having someone yell at me like that REALLY makes me want to give them money. *sarcasm*
Are you allowed to tell us what charity?
greenpeace