LOL!!!!!

Knock knock.

Who's there?

GO FUCK YOURSELF.

A Women is in bed with her lover, who also happens to be her husbands best friend, they have sex for hours and after are lying in bed totally shattered, when the phone rings, it being the womens house, she picks up the reciever.

Her young lover looks over at her and listen in and only hears her side of the conversation.
In a cheery voice she says "hello?, Oh Hi Im glad that you called.Really? Thats wonderful I am so happy for you.That sounds really terrific.Great thanks, Ok Bye bye"

She hangs up the telephone and her lover asks "who was that?"

"oh" She replies " that was my husband telling me about the wonderful time hes having on his fishing trip with you"

I notice with some interest that the birdseed my Wife recentley purchased has gone past its "Best Before" date.
As Im not the sort of person who keeps any form of animal in a cage I was thinking i could disperese the Seed in the Backyard.

But then the Birds will just fly away, so whats the point.

If the Christchurch City Council thinks it can raise my rates to fund this ridicuolous craze of old People on Scooters, they better think again.
These characters dont even wear the correct safety equipment, such as knee/elbow Pads and Helmets.

The end is neigh,

There is a protest on next week.

I am not sure what time it starts, or even what it is about, but your support is greatly appriciated.

I'll be dressed in the Pantomine Horse Costume.
(I hope I get the front half).

Free B.M.X. Policy "Unsustainable".

Treasury have poopooed the Free B.M.X. campaign as world rubber prices continue to rise.
"Whilst supplies of Hot Air are in great abundance presently, the Country will soon be broke if every one gets one of these flash bikes I missed out on as a kid" said some nameless spokesman for the MoneyMen.

When will Television Programmers realise that Gays only make up a small proportion of New Zealand Society? I for one, dread the day when Homosexuality is compulsory.

Handgrips are a surefire way to make you a better Guitarist. Instead of actually playing your instrument you can strngthen your hands, cos, thats like the most important thing.

My 6 year old Daughter has Chicken Pops. She's perplexed because we are vegetarian.

Can you guess which one of these is a real letter to the Editor from NZ's finest periodical "The T.V. Guide"?

Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo'drizzle.

Have you heard of the marriage between two young people from two tribes of Behethren people in North Eastern India.

It was customary for a new home and stock as part of the brides dowry to be established partway between each of the family villages so that neither couple is further away from or closer to each others ancestral home.

Tradionally the grooms family 'gifts' a dog which symbolises both loyalty to the 'union' and protection of the bride, future family and stock.

The bride leaves her home village with family and dowry to meet the groom at their new home who is waiting with his family after making a similar journey from his home village one week before making sure that everything is 'in order'.

After the wedding celebration the newly weds sleep together for the first time. The families continue celebrate with festive food and drink and dance fertility dances and pray for long life and prosperity.

The dog is traditionally